Day 5: Just (Don't) Say "NO" and Day 10: Positivity
First a quote from Ryan’s blog:
“It's so easy to get discouraged with everyday stress and third party negativity. If you forget to let good thoughts be your sword and shield then you are going into battle unprepared.
“It's so AWESOME to be positive! Misery loves company, but you don't have to be its date!”
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Since I’m still in catch-up mode, it makes sense to me to combine “a day without no” with a day of positive thoughts. And the line from Ryan’s blog that I quoted above has given me inspiration.
After 12 hours of sleep, punctuated by a 1 AM upset stomach, no doubt stress related (though I have my doubts about the Whole Foods rotisserie chicken – when I shock my body with foods that are free of all impurities, it tends to rebel), I awoke to a miserable, rainy day. Still mourning my lost vacation, I wanted to just roll over and shoot for another 12, but my dog was doing that dog thing. You know: Staring. Whimpering. Pacing. Everything short of saying “Yo, I’m hungry and I’ve gotta pee! Get out of bed!”
So I reluctantly did my morning routine: Stretch. Pee. Brush teeth. Wash face. (Not a lot different from the dog, now that I think about it.) Went downstairs, poured coffee, shoveled out dog food. Hubby was good enough to brave the rain with Oreo so I got to check the computer and be alone with my thoughts for a while.
OK, so how to salvage this un-vacation weekend. First of all, I do not want to be in the house another day. So we discussed lunch and a movie. Sounds good for starters. I didn’t say no to either idea. And thinking of both did wonders to raise my spirits. Starting off on a good foot …
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We decided on an 11:30 AM show. Two benefits: Cheaper seats and an empty theater. While Joe waited for overpriced popcorn, I noticed a Starbucks counter and availed myself of their overpriced caramel latte, smiling positively the entire time.
Sure enough, we were one of only three people in the theater. Sat down and five minutes later another couple came in … and sat down two seats away from us. Immediately negative thoughts flooded my mind: Are they going to try to rip us off? Why would someone sit two seats away from us when there is an entire empty theater? I whispered my concern to my husband, who just shrugged. I decided to think positively. Perhaps they were agoraphobic and didn’t like the feeling of being in a big empty room.
The movie was a good one: The Social Network. All about the early days of Facebook – a subject I could definitely relate to. Afterward, we went to lunch at the Black Bear Saloon. Also a good pick. The positive mood is going strong. Not much reason to use the “N” word either, except to say “No thank you” when asked if I’d like to order dessert.
When we left the mall, the rain had stopped so we decided to engage in our favorite pursuit: geocaching! This would surely be a test of my positivity!
Our first attempt netted a DNF (that’s “Did Not Find” for those of you who are not geocachers). Poking around a wet bench in a very public area of West Haven, looking for a small magnetic container was bad enough. The fact that it started raining again was worse. Feeling a small bit of nasty coming on, we returned to the car.
On to cache # 2, this time at a popular park that we figured would be empty in the rain. Wrong. A bunch of teens and their dogs were hanging around the spot we needed to be, so again we returned to the car without even searching. Now my inner bitch was seething. Screaming “NOOOOOOOOO!” loudly in my head. So as I got into the car, I slammed the door shut and said, “I’m angry and I have to vent! I’m angry that we didn’t go to New Hampshire. I’m angry that we’re geocaching in West Haven instead of the White Mountains. And I’m angry that it’s still raining!” There. I managed to say all of that without saying “no” even once. And getting all that negative energy out also let me turn my attitude around and get more positive.
From there, the rest of the geocaching adventure went a lot better. I even knew when to call it quits and go home. And we were able to choose a restaurant for the evening and plan tomorrow without argument.
This was definitely one of my more successful and awesome days thus far! But importantly, I learned that it wasn’t enough to put on a happy face and “stuff” the negative feelings, but instead to express them quickly and move on.
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